Category: Uncategorized

April 20th, 2011

Who Me, A Blog?

It has officially been a year since I updated this blog, and that simple fact evinces the need for change.  I am still tied to the idea of thoughtful, meditative, and microscopic pieces, and rather embarrassed that this particular venue for them has laid fallow for so long.  But embarrassment can be eradicated through acknowledgement and action.  So I’m taking a new approach, which means . . . TWITTER!

This blog will stay mainly the same (the ostensible purpose is imprecise enough as to be malleable)—except it will be updated more frequently!  But it will also be the locus of my new Twitter project: THE TWITTER HOME FOR ABANDONED SENTENCES or @lilorphanaxiom.

Check out the call for entries here.

And follow me on Twitter.

 

Technology is the mother of reinvention.

September 23rd, 2009

Not Being Right

I got in a fight with my [friend/lover/mother/boss].  [She/he] grilled me about the deficiencies of others and my own enablement.  I did not bow out and leave the pecking to its principals.  Therefore, I got in a fight with myself.

            It’s not good versus evil, what I want versus what I don’t.  Maybe wise versus willful.  Patience is readiness.  Listening is the truth, mainly tacitly, as it turns out.

July 23rd, 2009

A Modest Proposal

jumpfuckers4

When the American economy has fallen like Rome, and the ruins are being parsed for the reason, more astute analysts than I will be able to fully catalogue the causal relationship between penance foregone, and the end of an empire.  There is a need for blood.  If the economic elites don’t placate the populist fervor with some platelets, all our necks will meet the slit. 

Massive bonuses at Goldman Sachs, and the gold-plated hookers to follow, are blood-boiling and symptomatic, and they are ours to own.  We have allowed (if we were duped, it is still our disinterest and exceptionalism that left the fine print unread) our system to run on atavistic excess without an equally primitive leveling system, like the guillotine.  Evolution would entail a surge in humility, humility with which the 21st century has yet to flirt.  We have, however, been stealing some tender afternoons in a motel room with hubris.

Our access to humility seems stymied by a convenient, catch-as-catch-can version of morality in which riches received are, de facto, earned.  While it takes a wealth of skill to orchestrate the combination of bundled mortgages, bailout money, and short-selling that leave the stockbrokers’ pocket’s well-lined, every dollar gained on definitively extinguishing some delinquent’s hope also gives its owner a percentage of the rot to his soul. 

Our current economy is a feast of venality and relativism for the rich and poor alike.  Soon, maybe in my lifetime, the poor will run out of money to pay, and blood will cease to be a metaphor.  The same Everyone’s Doing It equivocation one banker invokes to siphon off another man’s subsistence will give the broke man no pause before flaying that banker and drinking from his skull. 

Eye for an eye is a paltry binary, and vengeance absolves no one. Repentance isn’t found in the refuge of moral equivalence.  This is your chance bankers: take back the image of white collar workers leaping out of high rises from Al Qaeda like black people took back the n-word.  Your penance will be drastic, to mirror your sins, if it has any hope of salvation.  So jump you sons of the American Dream.  If you want to live.

 

February 2nd, 2009

A Ghost

ghost-hunter 

His name is John Kohler.  I’m not so wild about believing in him.  When I open my bathroom mirror I think I’ll close it to his rotten face, and all I see is my own.  I whip my head around to check the hallway all the time.  That’s where he dropped dead.

            I think he approves of me in various states of undress only.  The hallway has a full-length mirror, and I expect to see him there too.  But when my eyes catch the mirror, they linger on my own image.  I get distracted; my vanity takes over. 

            John Kohler was not a beloved man.  People didn’t ask where he was, just basked in his absence.  My next door neighbor had to realize that no one could be cooking asparagus for that many days.  He smelled so bad she had to pay a kid to break in through the fire escape.  He smelled so bad after two weeks and no less.

            It’s a miracle apartment if you can say no one died in it.  At least he doesn’t pressure me for any earthly favors.  I wonder if he would like it if I turned on some Judge Judy for him, or the Family Feud.  Maybe he would find me condescending.

            When we filled the hallway with a mirror, I thought only of the most opportune way to ogle myself in outfits.  That’s what I do most of the time.